I am one of the lucky ones. Let me be very clear on this. I have wonderful, supportive parents and family, who are proud of my accomplishments, who would have been proud of me not matter what.

I have an amazing husband who has known from the beginning that I would be the primary earner, and does not feel threatened by it. (And does his share of the housework.)

I work in a field where women are prevalent in executive positions.

But just because I haven’t felt discriminated against doesn’t give me the luxury of pretending the problem doesn’t exist.

My father asked me if he had ever told me I couldn’t do something because I was a girl. He never did. But the messages we pass on to our children aren’t always conscious. What follows is not meant to be a critique of my parents, simply a notation of how we foster different attitudes for our daughters than we do our sons.

Our family started collections for my brother and I. His: model airplanes and baseball caps. Mine: perfume bottles and dolls. We both went shooting with our father. I was never given my own gun; my brother was.