Gratitude Journal #41

Four days left in the year, and Four Gratitude Entries to go before reaching my goal of 100. I have tried over the year to remember to be grateful for the little things, like the Starbucks employees who start work at 4a, so that when I pull into the drive-thru at 6a, someone is there to make me my Chai tea latte. But the truth is, what I am most grateful for in my life are the people. And so, this last week’s worth of gratitude entries are going to be about the people I am grateful for.

Gratitude Entry #97 –  D, E, & all of our friends
While I am calling out specific people in these posts, I think it is important to say that we are blessed with a lot of friends who have been there for us over the past few years, offering their friendship and support. On some level, current roommate D and longtime friend E are standing in for all of them.

During the darkest of the days, D & E were there for me. E was a roommate at the time too (as he often is when between jobs). They were the people who checked on me daily, who made me sit and watch movies or television with them, even though they are both introverts who would have been just as happy (or happier) sitting in front of their computers. One of the rules for our home is that we have to have room for both of them.

Life is complex, and we all have our own things going on, but friends make room for each other in their lives. Sometimes we go a bit without talking or seeing each other, but these are the people we can call on when life goes sideways.

I am so very grateful for all of the friends who have put up with us the last few years, when everything was about us, and we had almost no capacity to care about what was happening in other’s lives. And I am grateful for the people who forced me to step outside of my life and care about what was going on with them. 

All relationships are ebb and flow. The hope is that when one ebbs, the other flows, and that in the end, it all works out. But sometimes you are all ebbing at the same time and things can fall apart. And I know I was not a very good friend to many people during the worst of the situation. And I know I let a few people down. But somehow, we made it through. All of us. 

 D & E put up with the worst of me. I am trying to be a better friend now. And I am so grateful that people are giving me a chance.