I was short on ideas (once again) for what to write about tonight, so I asked on twitter for someone to give me a topic. Lance from Money, Life & More suggested I write about what’s in front of me- which is a mostly messy desk. I kind of listed everything (well, no everything) on my desk, and then it occurred to me, I always really like those “things you don’t know about me” posts, but have never bothered to type one up myself because, well, I’m a pretty open book. Most things I could reveal about myself in one of those posts, I’ve already mentioned in another blog post somewhere. But there’s one thing I haven’t mentioned before, and I think it will make a great post.

The Shortest Job I’ve Ever Had

Back in 2001, I quit my job as a medical receptionist. It was a high stress job and I was constantly sick, or at least, constantly calling in sick because I was just so stressed. I knew I needed to leave, but I also knew I should have a job lined up before I did. The problem was, at the time, I was planning on going in to the Peace Corps by the end of the year. I didn’t want to lie to anyone about how long I would be there, so while I had some interviews… Well, for the first time in my life, I interviewed for a job and wasn’t offered it.

Then one night while watching TV a great idea popped right up on the screen. I could tell people’s fortunes over the phone.

You remember those commercials, don’t you? Well, those companies were always hiring for new people. You didn’t even have to go anywhere. You got to work from home and just logged in via your phone when you wanted to start receiving calls and logged out when you were done. You did have to work a minimum of 2 hour blocks to get paid, but hey- this was perfect.

It was a job I could do around everything else I needed to do, and I wouldn’t feel guilty leaving it when it was time for me to go. All I needed was to come up with my fortune telling alias and a dedicated phone line. As a role player, I had tons of great names to choose from, and given that this was in the age of dial up modems, I just used the phone line that was dedicated to the computer. Done.

Let me be honest- I worked the phones one night, for maybe 45 minutes, and it broke me.

I do read tarot. I’m actually pretty good at it, even over the phone, partly because it’s as much about listening to people as it is the cards. The problem was with the people who called. I think I took 3 phone calls. I remember 3 phone calls. The first was a woman in an abusive relationship- I ended that call giving her an 800 number for abused women. The next was a guy in the middle of a nasty custody battle who just wanted to know when he’d see his kids again. And the third? Another woman in an abusive relationship.

Maybe if my degree had been in psychology I would have felt comfortable advising these people, but their problems were nothing I had any personal experience with at 25, and it was just too depressing for me. I never logged in again.

After that, I registered with all the temp agencies in town. And for those of you wondering, no, I never joined the Peace Corps. C and I broke up and I moved out. I realized during that time that I felt like my life was on hold, not until I got my assignment, but until I got back. I decided that wasn’t the attitude I should be going in with. I pulled myself out of the process. C and I got back together (the Peace Corp thing wasn’t actually the issue, though it may seem like it here) and we moved to Seattle, Labor Day weekend, 2001.