A Budget is NOT the first thing you need

Lets start with the very basics. Everyone always says you need a budget, and you need to stick to it. Which isn’t bad advice, but not if you don’t have the tools to create a realistic budget.  Without the right information, people end up creating budgets that won’t get them where they want to go or they can’t stick to. And that’s if they even create a budget in the first place.

So what do you need to create a budget? Information. 
For an entire month, maybe two months, track every single little penny that comes in to your hands or leaves your hands. Write it down. You have to know how much money you have and where it goes. Be honest during this time. Don’t decide not to buy something because you don’t want to write it down (though if that’s the case, think about whether you really need it); don’t pay extra on a bill that you normally wouldn’t. That corrupts your data. Just like when talking ot your doctor about health issues, your financial tracking needs to be a complete and honest picture of your spending habits.
Most people know the incoming amounts, but very few people (who aren’t already on the budget journey) actually know where all their money is going. This is why you track. Did you realize that you spend $5 on coffee every morning without thinking about it? Have you thought about the fact that you’re running to the grocery store almost every day, getting just one or two items here and there? Have you paid any attention to what your cell phone bill really is?
Create categories for your spending. My categories are:
Student Loans
College 
Bills (includes mortgage, utilities, cell phone)
Car (car payment, gas, insurance, parking)
Credit Cards
Groceries (food & household items)
Medical
Eating Out
Allowance (clothes, books, movies, etc)
Pets
House (home improvement, kitchen gadgets)
Miscellaneous
Savings
Income
The important thing is that you create categories that work for you. But be aware that you might someday need or want to change your categories. I review mine at least once a year to decide if I’m still tracking things in a way that makes the most sense for us. And I make changes to them when it makes sense to do so.
Now, I use excel for my checkbook and tracking spending. Mostly because then I never have to do the math. But I’m also enough of a geek that I color code everything. This way, if I don’t have time to put it in the tracking spreadsheet when I enter it in the checkbook, I still color code it, and I can tell at a glance if we’re eating out a lot, or running to the store more often than we’d like.
So that’s step one. Simply track your money. Don’t try to judge yourself or fix any issues you think you might have while in the tracking stage. Just get the data.