My plans for this past three day weekend were to do nothing. I was very much looking forward to three days of not much. Saturday went exactly according to plan. I had a massage appointment for my shoulder and then C and I took June and Larry to the dog park while Howie stayed home with J (at 13, too many dog park trips will aggravate Howie’s arthritis).

Sunday started pretty lazy, too. As C was making us a late breakfast, though, I talked to my cousin in Portland. She had a lot of things going on, and a lot of stress. In addition to this being mid-terms at school, a friend of hers had gone into the hospital and my cousin was serving as the contact. (Her friend’s family all live out of the country.) My cousin looked at everything she needed to get done, made a determination of how much she could get done, and what had to be done by her (her homework) and what she could ask for help on. She called me and asked for help. C and I drove down to Portland Sunday afternoon.

What my cousin needed most was emotional support and to know that her family was there for her. But she also needed to get some financial issues sorted out. She could not remember what bills she had paid and which ones she hadn’t. She had a medical bill that she had been making payments on where she could not find the latest statements and did not know how much she still owed. There were questions about other medical bills and what her insurance had covered and what it had not. And finally, there were taxes. And at the end of it, she wanted to make sure she had enough money to pay her bills through the end of the semester.

None of this took me very long- maybe 90 minutes total. I spent the most time doing her taxes. They were not complicated, but she needed a 1040A instead of the EZ to take advantage of the tuition adjustment, and I forgot that you need to save the pdf from the IRS site before you fill it out. If you fill it out and can not print it right away and try to save it, it saves only the blank form. I think I filled out the form 3 or 4 times before all was said and done.

I did all of this while she was in a make up class scheduled by a teacher who had had to cancel class earlier in the week. She left me with her user ids and passwords, as well as her tax information. It did not occur to her (or me) that she should not do this because she trusts me.

The situation (with the 2.5 hour each way drive between Seattle and Portland) got me to thinking- if I were in a similar situation, who could I call? Well, not quite a similar situation, but say C or I were in the hospital, or both of us were, and there were just too many other things to keep track of besides whether or not the cable bill had been paid. Who would I call?

Now, in some cases, there would be less to handle- a lot of our bills are automated and my paycheck is direct deposited, but there’s always a few things that need to be done, checkbooks to be balanced, etc. Is there someone I trust enough that I could simply hand over all of my user ids and passwords and trust them to sort it all out?

And it’s not just about trust- it’s about aptitude. I would trust roommate J with all of those things, but managing finances is not his thing. I am not saying he could not do it, just that it’s not in his normal wheelhouse.

My parents are both states away. Certainly not in a situation where they could simply drop what they were doing and come spend an afternoon doing my finances. In a dire enough situation, either or both of them would come and help out, but if it were not a long term thing, I would not even want to ask them.

In the end, I would probably ask my friend Jen (please note that roughly 20% of all women in my age group are named Jen/Jennifer, I am not giving away anyone’s identity). She is customer service manager for a bank. Her girlfriend is getting her MBA and works in the medical field. Between the two of them, I know they would be good at going through all the details and making sure bills were paid and being able to figure out the details of insurance explanation of benefits. Jen would be the one I gave the log in information to, but it would not bother me if her girlfriend helped out going through documents.

The other thing that occurred to me is that I am very lucky. Knowing I have someone in my life that I could trust in that kind of situation is comforting, and probably not hugely common for those who do not live in close proximity to their families.

Who would you call?